What a (fantastic) waste of time...

It's been while since I've last posted, and I have honestly thought that nobody was reading anyway, nut then I had a few people here and there tell me that they follow the blog... so this one's for those three people:

Have you ever noticed that our culture places a lot of emphasis on productivity and efficiency? I'm sure this is brand new information to you. Even as I type these words, I admit that I had to force myself this afternoon to go lie down rather than to sit here and type out this post... to see words and pictures come out on a screen, or to see toys and books on the shelf from the floor, or the see the dishwasher empty then full, then empty then full (then empty then full) feels good- like I've accomplished something in this little Dawson microcosm. I also try to use their video time to get these chores done in a speedier fashion (No, Baby Einstein, I do not use your videos for interactive play time). We housewives might be the worst at succumbing to the pressures of productivity over any fortune five hundred CEO (sorry to pick on you if one is reading this).

So now that I've blown our cover, I wanted to mention a little secret that has been revealed to me recently. Let me clear the air that it is not my intelligence or mothering skills that has revealed the following thoughts, but the loving ways of God- He is such a gentle teacher when I stop to listen...

1) We went on a FAMILY RETREAT in Panama City Beach, Florida. I imagine that those two words seem diametrically opposed to one another, and I'm sure one could argue that a retreat is NOT a waste of time to go on retreat, but on this particular retreat, there is a point in the afternoon called family time, and I love the way that the priest spoke of it. He said something like, "this is meant to be a time to waste with your family! Nothing else is happening, you aren't preparing for the next week's events, you'll be building sand castles that will be washed away within minutes and it will be all for nothing, and the only thing to do is talk and play with your kids, and it is incredibly inefficient!"

What a beautiful time this turned out to be! After a morning of spiritual formation among adults, the afternoon is spent with my family! We've been on three family retreats so far, and I can attest to the incredible amount that DOESN'T get done- but so much happens that cannot be measured (unless, of course, we post our family time experiences on Facebook, because otherwise, did it really happen?) The best example of this is David with the kids at the beach. Their favorite thing to do is DIG A HOLE! It's a group effort, and it's their favorite thing to do on the beach besides wading out into the water in his arms, in which case, whoever is left on shore with me gets to throw endless handfuls of sand into the waves.

And of course, Mary Clare (at 7 weeks) did this the entire time on the beach. 

Talk about a team player!

The other aspect of wasting time together is that just because you're not do work doesn't mean that spending time as a family is easy. It's very hard, not only because we are fighting our own desire to be getting something else done, but because spending time with our families brings about... all the things that happen when you hang with your fam -> this means, fighting, disciplining, spills, arguments, misunderstanding, and frustration. But the beauty of it is that we're learning to be family, and that's all we're doing...

We have a little rule in our family that Sunday's are always family time- nothing else happens on Sundays. We don't do anything but hang out and eat (and have glorious sleep). This is difficult for me (and I'll sometimes empty the dishwasher if we've run out of counter space due to the dirty dishes, but David looks at me like I'm cheating) usually because I am looking around the house and seeing the projects that didn't get done that weekend and fearing the week ahead because of it. This practice has become so joy-filled and fruitful for us!!

2) Micah has needed us to waste time with HIM lately:

As it turns out, having a baby has rocked this little guy's world. As much as I can tell, his love languages are physical touch and quality time - two things that he has NOT had from me since Mary Clare has been born. He will be TWO this Saturday (can you believe it?) and his needs, when not met, have made him extremely high maintenance... poor little guy. A major fruit of the family retreat was that Micah and I had a lot of time together just the two of us. There was a lot for the children to do while the parents were receiving spiritual formation, but Micah would have NONE of the nursery, despite it being a haven of little kid toys and goldfish. He spent most of his time with me while David was giving talks, and the fruits of that really showed itself the following week when we returned home. He was more content, sillier, happier, and had less tantrums. It showed me that when I take the time to focus on Micah rather than constantly appease him (Want some juice? Here's your passy. Just a second) we were both much happier (and so was the rest of the household). Sometimes he just needs me to be doing nothing else but hanging out with him - books, snuggling, holding him while I check the mail, etc). This is one of those situations that, at the end of the day, you pray that Jesus and Mary fill in the gaps where our children may not have felt loved). I'm so grateful for this revelation from God.

3) Prayer- wasting time with the Lord:

In Domestic Church (see "retreat" link to know more... who am I kidding? If you have EVER read my blog, you've heard about Domestic Church) one of the daily commitments is individual prayer. The Israelites called it the "Tent of Meeting" because when they were in the desert, Moses used to leave the community and go away to a tent where he would speak with God face to face. Moses came out of the tent with a dazzling white face... that's exactly what my prayer is like... all the time!

In the last few years of learning how to improve this kind of prayer, a dear friend and priest helped me to further qualify what it means to pray by telling me to ask myself the question "am I wasting time with God?" In other words, the ONLY prayer during the day can't be done WHILE other things are going on. Mowing the grass, driving to work, folding the clothes. Can we converse with the Lord while these things are going on? ABSOLUTELY! Imagine, though, if the only conversations that you have with your spouse were had while doing something else. What about our children? How close would you feel to him/her? It's the same with God. So to truly pray means to be sitting in silence (or at a significantly smaller decibel level) and be with Him WHILE DOING NOTHING ELSE for a few minutes every day. AND THIS IS SO SO HARD!!

I'm sharing this revolutionary idea with you NOT because I've mastered it, but quite the contrary. The first step for me has been during that first morning video- it's a personal goal to NOT to go through the house like a white tornado trying the get things done, but to go to my room and enter the tent of meeting. Most of the time, I can merely acknowledge the reality that God is present before my little Micah man is frantically trying to open the door because I have left his sight. But for a few seconds I have focused on the images on our wall - usually the crucifix and Our Lady of Guadalupe and concentrate on the presence of the Lord (and His mother), and the fruits of those few precious moments is astounding.

Thanks for reading... now go be unproductive!!

"Ca C'est Bon, " cried the hurricane!

Well we're one month into being a family of 7!

It's been insane!! Today in particular I am learning a very important lesson... it's so cliche'!! DANCE EVERY DAY. Why am I saying this? Because I have cried the last few days each time things get a little hectic: baby is ready to eat. Someone is whining. A 22 month old (which speaks for itself) 2 children who have quality time and physical touch for love languages (and they haven't been getting much of it). Homeschooling has tanked...

No this is not a post to complain or to ask for your sympathy...

I stumbled upon one of my favorite CDs from one of my FAVORITE families on the planet! I have played it each day when I feel the hot tears brimming. I pick of the child/children who I might throw through the window (yes I said that) and dance with them... sweet relief for every one. I wouldn't change this INSANITY for anything! I love being up to my neck in my little olive plants. God is so good (and He isn't afraid of a little insanity).

And now I shall leave you... because the 3 1/2 year old has his easter basket stuck around his neck. The baby is screaming to nurse and the 22 month old is trying climb out of his crib.

So in the words of this next song, "...don't be afraid to try to live the good life!"

Mary Clare Dawson ... the arrival post!

Just one day after her due date, Mary Clare came. Wednesday March 18th at 9:23 pm. The labor was during the day, the epidural was glorious, I could still wiggle my toes, and by 10 pm we were all quieted down and loving on our newest little olive plant!

 Sleeping beauty

My precious friend Amber came and is she captured a few moments...

Then the children and the grandparents came...

The first eye poke was captured...

Now we've been home for three weeks, and it has been a wonderful, fantastic, CRAZY, precious time with our larger family... I think it's safe to say that we have a big family, don't you? If you disagree, keep it to yourself until a year passes, ok? 

We had two wonderful weeks with David home. He's back at work now, and we're most definitely taking life one half-day at a time. 

Which is working out really well...

 (So maybe she's not into matching with her big sister...)

And how are the other big kids doing? 

They are superheroes!! 

Thank you for your prayers and know that you were prayed for during labor and delivery! God is so faithful and gracious! Praise God!!

Joyful anticipation... or at least attempting it.

Praise God we have arrived at full term (39 weeks and 2 days to be exact), and after a few trips to the hospital, some injections, some expensive prescriptions to stop contractions from causing any trouble, Mary Clare seems to be fully alive, jumpy, and content... you heard me. She's going nowhere.

Rather than worry about every little twinge and timing the daily false labor, I've decided to resign to the fact that I will simply be pregnant forever. It's been quite freeing, actually, because if I'm NEVER going to deliver Mary Clare, then I can get used to the pressure, the contractions, the insomnia, and the mood swings because they will be our family's new pet. See how I make jokes?

I'm not the best sufferer as most of my friends and family know, but I am certainly praying for a spirit of JOY-FILLED anticipation for our newest child. After three miscarriages, to be able to reach full term and meet this newest daughter, there is much to anticipate. This morning, however, it brought to mind the reality that we've had 5 beautiful years with our precious Therese Marie. Everything about her has been formed within this "only daughter" life she's lived so far. It has made her who she is, and oh how we love her so...

She is larger than life, and true to her namesake. Here's a perfect example of their similarities (she with St Therese of Lisieux): When St Therese was growing up, she and her older sister were approached with an offer of a basket filled of ribbons and they were told to pick the one they liked best. St Therese's response? "I want them ALL." THAT is our Therese Marie. Every flower, every beautiful sight, every chance to snuggle, every chance to hold a baby. As my mother says, "She takes life in big gulps." We ride in the van often listening to Therese "singing Polish" while the rest of the car is completely silent. And because Mary Clare is due so close to Therese's birthday (which is March 14th), Therese has already rehearsed what she will say to Mary Clare when they finally meet. "Hi, Mary Clare, I'm your sister Therese and I've been waiting for you, and it's my birthday." She is CERTAIN they we have somehow concocted the best birthday present for her... a sister. Yes, dear,  that's exactly what we did.

So I have here a few more pictures of our life in the Dawson world as we have so enjoyed living in Mandeville. We are grateful for God's providence in bringing us here and in His gracious love in sustaining us. We are blessed indeed...

 Jacob (3 1/2) and Micah (21 months) are a fantastic handful. Jacob is the funny man, and Micah is surprising us daily with what he remembers and has the vocabulary to for. 

I turned 33 last month, and David took them all to pick out special gifts for me. It's hard to see, but John Paul picked out a crown, Therese picked at the rockin' necklace, Jacob picked super larger dangly owl earrings (he must know I'm still a Chi Omega at heart), and Micah "picked out" a Papa Johns gift card. I want to say that David found a beautiful reliquary for our first class relic of St Therese, so now she's visible to us instead of in a little box. We're takin' care of you, Sista. 

Boys Boys Boys

The "Big Kids" of the Dawson grandbabies: Therese (almost 5), Luke (3), Micah (21 months),    Liam (5), John Paul (6 1/2), Ceceilia Jane (22 months), and Jacob (3 1/2). 

And Therese is holding the newest Dawson - Maximilian James, who is the fourth of Pete and Julia. Yes we have our children at the same time. Laugh, but aren't you a little sad that you didn't think of it first? My sister-in-love and I are always pregnant and then nursing together... good times shared with precious family.

When Daddy works from home because Mommy is on bed rest... the mice will play?

Me and my T

Is our 3 1/2 year old potty trained, you may ask yourself? The answer is a resounding NO. Have I thought about training him? Really? Of course I have. Is the stress of training a precious little man who's afraid to teetee, etc worth the complication of NOT having three in diapers? Not even a little bit. I've had three in diapers before and we survived just fine. Potty training is for another time... like when I'm NOT 39 weeks pregnant. There. That's my excuse.

I just love this one. This is her response to, "Therese, smile." I was able to take the older three to our precious next door neighbor's powder puff football game. It was so nice to have them with me, because very soon, it will be David who takes the big kids on outings while I'm home with Mary Clare. Because I was fully aware of this, we went from the game strait to IHOP and had pancakes and hot chocolate! Soakin' it up, y'all!

 Meet Taylor. Our sweet next door neighbor and sole babysitter at this point. Before Therese could remember her name, she would call her, "the girl who is really generous." She's a senior in high school, but we won't talk about that...

And so our family waits- we are so excited to meet our next little olive plant. 

So long until "the birth post"

Happy Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes...

To celebrate, here's Jacob (3) and Micah (20 months) singing "Inoculate Mary, You Reign now in Prison"

Be set free...

Yesterday's Gospel showed Jesus' authority. By merely speaking, "Quiet. Come out," the demons were gone...

I write this morning from bedrest- the beautiful and tortuous order from my obgyn because Mary Clare seems to be trying to escape before she's done baking. A few injections and an ultrasound over the weekend stopped the "bad" contractions and revealed that the conditions in the oven are still conducive to baking... I say that contractions are bad because as many of you know, when you're in real labor, bad contractions are good because they are doing their job. In my case over the weekend, the contrations were (what this little weenie of a sufferer considers) epidural worthy, but weren't "doing anything" (to spare in extra details) and were too early to be so intense. Ergo, they were bad.  There, I've justified an epidural in the future. Done.

Now, the reason for this post...

During his homily yesterday, our precious pastor asked a question for reflection: what demons hold you captive? From what do you need to be set free?

This (being the only thing that I heard during the homily) really struck me, and I found myself asking the question all day. I reflected last night on what my answers were, and knowing the true power that Scripture holds... a sword to fight the real battle that is raging in our world today, I decided to dig into what Scripture has to say about my demons that hold me captive at times. I would like to share them with you (just in case you care to know me a little better than you did at the beginning of this post and just in case these also hold you captive) I pray that my openess to share my weakness with the weapon of Scripture will set you free!

First, I will pray an exerpt from St Therese's morning offering: I desire to sactify every beat of my heart, my every thought, my simplest works, by uniting them to HIS infinite merits; and I wish to make reparation for my sins by casting them into the furnace of His merciful love..."

Here goes...

1) "Laziness of Speech" was the way God put it when He revealed this weakness of mine, but we all know is as "Potty mouth Mama" ...

Col 4:6 "Let your speech by always with grace..."
Col  3:8 "Put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, and obscene language out of your mouths..."
Matt 15:18 "But those things which come out of the mouth defile a person..."
James 3:10 "Out of the same mouth come blessing and cursing... these things need not be so."

2) Anger

See Col 3:8
Eph 4:26 "Be angry, but let it be without sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not leave room for the devil." ( I love this one)
Eph 4:30 (really this whole little section is full of good nuggets) "All bitterness, fury, anger, shouting, and reviling must be removed from you.. be kind to one another..."

3) Fear - this one really grips me, and I am unable to move in any direction. Darn you, Satan, you know how much this one gets me... you jackass (see problem number 1)

Isaiah 41:10 "Fear not, I am with you... I will strengthen you and hold you. I will help you."
1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your fears on Him because He cares for you."
Phil 4:6,7 "Have no anxiety at all; but instead with prayer and petition, make your needs known to God."
Psalm 34:4 "I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and He delivered me from all my fears."

These were three of my weaknesses that grip me, and I know that I know that I know that Godd doesn't want ANY walls between He and I ... I pray to be set free, and I pray the you will feel like freedom is His desire for you as well...

January's projects...

Well this is first time in five years that I have not had to post about my internal (and thus turning into external) struggles with the March for Life because (drum roll).... DAVID DIDN'T GO! I have had to freedom of not dealing with anticipatory anxiety of have no Daddy around for 8 days (I know, I'm such a wimp). So what happens on January 22 as I wake up the morning of the march and read the readings and begin to pray for those marching and those who've suffered abortions? You guessed it, I cried  sobbed tears of guilt that I had always been so against David's being a huge part of taking hundreds of children's life-changing experience, and I was a basket case thinking of all the people who've experienced the tragedy of abortion. I'm really just a hot mess, ya'll.

So the day of March, we  did our small part... our own little march for life- because that's what we do mama's, y'all hear me? We march for life EVERY DAY in our homes with our little olive plants! It was in the form of prayers and a picnic lunch...

And this evening, we participated in our first project fair! RCHAL (Roman Catholic Home School Assoc of Louisiana) has been a grace from God to keep me in the loop of what's going on with other home school families on the North Shore (not that we can jump in on everything). After seeing the enthusiam of the kids while reading Little Critter's "Just a Science Project," when I asked the kids if they wanted to be a part of this, they were ecstatic!

John Paul wanted to compare Legos to Megabloks, and so he and David hashed it out one evening earlier this week and he and I put the poster together. He was SO confident when he presented to the group (yes, everyone presented their projects). I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest while I hid behind his poster. He was so confident, he interjected his own opinion here and there, and he was a total natural. When this little man puts his mind to something... that's IT!

Therese Marie initially wanted to do her project on "what makes puppies surprised," but when I suggested something a little less complicated  time-consuming different, she dove right in... Animal Baby's names. We printed simple sketches of different animals, she glued them on the construction paper, and she glittered up her poster. Each picture has the animal's name with the baby's name on top.... did you know that a baby swan is called a cygnet? Who knew? Therese did fantastic when she presented! I could that her face and neck were red, which was a bit of a shock to me, but nobody else could see anything but ADORABLE SWEET and SMART Therese Marie.

And of course, Jacob introduced himself (as "Three years old") and stood in the picture with everyone else. This little man is turning into a funny man (his Granddaddy called this when he was less than 6 months). I am so in love with this kid!

Here's all the hard workers. 

And let's revisit this jaw-dropper...

 Seriously, y'all? I can't handle it...

And to this list of January's projects... I'm 33 weeks pregnant... which means I'm nesting. So look out!